Get the CDC in There, Stat!

Come on, they've got to start taking Kim's blood or whatever.

And we think our family has communication challenges!

Tender, and Not At All Ruthless!

Jack is in a World Of Pain.

Kim looks a little haggard. And also lipwear challenged.

Taking Bets On How Old Kim Is?

"M" is wondering, if like on the soaps, it won't even be the same actress!

I can't tell if it's the same Kim or not!!!

Kiiiiiimmmmmm

She is such a worm. Jack is going to be pissed about Kim. If he remembers to be upset at all. He might be losing the ruthless part of himself

The Pres is going to call a medic

By the way who are you?

Really, Madam Pres... you have time for real-time updates on Jack's condition????

Tony

Whew, thankfully he's not dead.

Maybe Madame President is going to be the one who called Kim.

KIM!!!!

Improbable Convo with Madame President -- Again

Ah, Tony's pardon.

Jack might be forgetting enough to allow someone to call Kim!

You're Under Arrest!

The President just arrested Hodges!

And we accused her of micromanaging earlier in the season!

Greg's Still An Enigma

Is Greg gonna turn out to be a good guy after all? I have a feeling that only one of those two guys is going to survive this meeting.

Everyone Knows Tony!

While he was a terrorist, he must have done a gig on American Idol or something.

(Or maybe they're all Facebook friends?)

Ah, The Good Looking Bald Evil Doctor!

He's a babe!

Canisters

The canisters? That's something that harks back to an earlier season!

"Tony, got any C-4?" "Of course Jack, it's in my ManPurse, next to my hair gel and lipstick."

Jack, calling the President! And the Joint Chiefs have also entrusted Tony! Tony, is anyone going to give him amnesty?

And now Renee is giving Larry orders? Huh?

(I'm predicting that Tony is toast, again...)

Previously on 24: 12pm - 1am

OK, last week bugged me so much that I may have blocked it out.

I'll see if I can remember any of it. The one upside is the foreshadowing of Kim's return -- ok, maybe it's a double-edged sword. We're kind of dreading it. Although she is unambiguously stupid, and not evil, which is kind of a relief.

(If only we could have more than one resurrection per season, maybe they'd bring Nina back, too!)

The standoff at Starkwood ends with the FBI slinking off. But not before they get some comms on Tony. Because he's such a trustworthy guy, he's apparently been mysteriously deputized.

Jack has been infected with weaponized and fast acting Crutzfeldt-Jakob disease. Incorrectly, according to the neurologist in my life -- thankfully my friend and not my physician -- characterized as "mad cow". Whatever.

This disease is hitting Jack hard and fast, though he manages to keep his shirt clean despite the convulsions. He's given injections that will allow him to deal with some of the symptoms.

I'm going to just spew plot points, they may not be in order. Along with my nefarious demands. Bring back Nina! Bring back the Chloe's actual character, not just a pod person. Bring back the writers from season 5!

So, the action at Starkwood's compound involves actually finding the WMDs. Starkwood board member and 40-something hottie Doug Knowles apparently knows where they are. And thankfully, Jack has number. Knowles is tapped to help Tony -- it just gets better and better. We learn that Tony's been entrusted with this op by everyone from Madame President on down.

They're sneaking around while Janeane/Janis hacks the Starkwood systems to get them into one of the buildings.

Despite her talent at shutting down power plants and hacking into security systems, she's not quick enough. Doug gets caught by Starkwood security and taken off to Jon Voight (aka Hodges/Daddgelina). Tony slinks off after the WMDs.

Tony kills some Starkwood guys, gets an ID card and body armor, and takes an elevator 5 levels below ground (but his phone still works! in Hell!) and gives his BFF Larry a call. (Tony encounters the first really hot bad guy of this season, an evil doctor who totally buys into Tony's disguise.)

Somehow, Tony's got to give Jack a video feed of the WMDs so that Jack can fulfil Mme. President's request that Jack personally give visual confirmation that these are the real thing.

Whatever.

After a bizarre diatribe about what Daddgelina's up to with the WMDs and his bruised feelings about the devaluation of Starkwood's contribution to the republic -- and his feeling that he had treated Doug as a son (foreshadowing a bad end for sure) Daddgelina brutally murders him. Another handsome dead guy.

Oilivia is confirmed to be totally freaking evil.

Her ex-boyfriend, the blackmailing journalist she used to get rid of Ethan, threatens to release the story about the raid on Starkwood's compound. She stops by his hotel suite (evil reporters stay in the best hotels) and allows him to "convince" her that an assignation will be just the thing to silence him...in the afterglowy moment when he reveals that he's going to go ahead and release the story, instead of a cigarette, she whips out the cell phone video she just filmed of their, uh, encounter. He appears silenced, if not chastened, by her threat to put that one out there to the world and his wife. She tells him to find another job, gets dressed and heads back to the White House. Flanked by Aaron. (Who we totally heart; hopefully this warm feeling will not be abused by the writers this season.)

A doctor tells Jack that adult stem cells might experimentally work to reverse the effects of weaponized CJD, but that they'd have to come from a relative. Jack is totally in a World of Pain, he doesn't want to reach out to Kim. (Don't worry, Jack, Renee will do it.) No foreshadowing of the nephew/son or his dad from the previous season.

Tony and Jack confirm the WMD, and the President calls an air strike on Starkwood. (Jack tells Tony to get out.) Starkwood is prepared for this, they can somehow see this on their radar. (But they can't see Tony slinking around?)

(And WTH, the FBI left with their tails between their legs on some legal point about illegal searching...but it's ok for the President to call an airstrike on American soil because a known rogue has shown them some cell phone video footage?)

The episode ends with Hodges calling on a phone line he's covertly had installed at the White House and demanding to talk with Mme. President.

Wiping the foam from his mouth, Daddgelina tells the President if she doesn't call off the air strike, he'll shoot some missiles at various targets on American soil. He also wants to come over to the White House an improbable convo with Mme. President.

(There was a particularly neat effect where Hodges was apparently filming himself on a little camera while talking with Mme. President, so you saw two images of him simultaneously...I have to say that the personal video devices are turning out to be worthy of a screen credit this season.)

She aquiesces, and has the air strike cancelled without explaining herself to any of her cabinet members or staffers, and stalks out of the room to the White House kitchen, getting ready to grind beans and put on a pot of Joe for Hodges' visit.

As Craig points out, tonight's episode is supposed to stop the clock.

If only! "M", I, and all of our 24 friends could get another 8 hours of our lives back. (And we'd be able to do it without having to renew our relationship with Kim Bauer.)

Bloop! Bloop!

Yoga Pose of the Day: Anantasana

Another great pose from Yoga Art And Science.

And the yogi has the sort of serene poise of one who has left all conflict behind.

Kind of like this season of 24. The conflict doesn't feel like it has any teeth!

As yogis, "M" and I should be pleased. But if we're going to consume this violent dreck, there should be a little bit of creativity and, dare we say, cojones!

Come back, 24, come back to us!

Recap

Dammit = 2 (one Mme. President)
Bauer Kills =0 (but Tony had what "M" called 2 quality kills)
Women Proven Stupid =0 (there are hardly any women this season)
Women Doubly Proven Evil =1
Perimeters =0
Improbable Convos with the President =1 (Jack)
Handsome Dead Men =1 (Knowles)
Seizures =1 (Jack)
Hair Gel moments =0
Resurrections =0
Opportunities to Invoke the 25th Amendment =1 or 2...

Dull, dull, dull. I have no more to say.

"M" predicts that if Kim comes back, she will be middle aged and wearing a mumu. Where's Chloe? M says Janice killed Knowles, because Chloe would have broken in to the system faster.

We both feel that 24 has been neutered. Sigh.

Mme President Dammit

Awesome. So who is the mole. My money is on .... gosh I don't know

Is He Filming Himself?

What a weird shot.

Split screen montage!

Oily, Yet Cold

Check and mate on you, Ken.

I no longer believe that Oilivia's evil is a result of a criminal level of stupidity.

Hey, did Madame President serve in the armed forces? Maybe that's why she feels qualified to run tac.

"M" says, yes she is on point with Jack

Knowles, You're History

He's toast. But first, Daddgelina has got to foam at the mouth.

M says: wow that was violent!!!!

Dude, Was That The Antidote

Maybe the handsome evil bald doctor was holding photos of the antidote?