Yoga Pose of The Week: Cobra

I don't recommend the head/neck alignment of the last two phases of the pose shown here -- that's a quick route to a headache. But the drawings sure are pretty.

This week, Cobra pose is brought to you by the villainously psychopathic Russians, all of whom surely embody snakes. Also, their soon to be toast accomplice, Bolly Boy.

Sigh, they don't make the 24 villains the way they used to.

Recap: 8 - 9pm

Dammit =4
Hair Gel moments = numerous
Purely evil parents =1 (where is Jack's Dad anyways?)
Accent problems = Multiple
Bauer kills =0
Explosions =0
Women Proven Stupid = "M" says, Bridezilla -- I say, wait to see how she deals with Kevin, she could be Evil
Women Proven Evil = possibly Mrs. Islamic President, because she appears not to be stupid, stay tuned
Mention of the Rods =1 (wait until next week, we're going for Canister pervasiveness)
Continuity of time/history issues =at least one...how old is Bridezilla?
Minutes of infant crocodile tears, preventing "M"'s live blogging =37

What about next week? Will Renee find a comb? Will we be given a reason to understand why Jack gives a hoot about Renee? Will we see the Islamic President's doe-eyed daughter again? And what about his Infidel Girlfriend -- is she still at CTU? Is Bridezilla finally going to change out of that cocktail dress? What's up with the kids of the Hyper-Evil Russian arms dealer.

Most important, will anything blow up? (Conventional or nucular.)

Prediction: Mrs. Islamic President is in on it -- she's totally in cahoots with Bolly boy. Arlo is toast. Renee will prove that she is not trying to commit suicide via Russian arms dealer.

I shoulda had that extra shot of espresso this afternoon...this hour with Jack and his friends would have put me to sleep as effectively as legs up the wall pose...

(And why it didn't work for "M"'s 3 month old, I don't know!)

Suicide By Russian Arms Dealer

Oh, Renee, you couldn't be that lucky.

Split Screen Montage!

Dammit!

Renee, you're cold. Vlad will probably like you better.

Isn't Bringing In Air Support Going to Blow Renee's Cover?

Not a decoy!

That Was Heartfelt

Excellent dammit from Jack. Dammit, Jack...you're never going to make tht plane to LA.

Tie Her Up!

Put them in the trunk!

WTH?

Another Hair Gel Moment

Renee.

She needs a comb, too.

Continuity?

Bridezilla was a minor when Kevin went in. So she's 23 or 24 and she's management in CTU? (Chloe's boss!!?)

With Kevin's LIttle Friend

The home invasion scenario looks even more plausible.

Vlad

Still has a soft spot for Renee...whatever transpired between them, he's still carrying a torch.

I'm Falling Asleep

Oh, but wait. This guy Ziya is beyond stupid...she's going to send him in to prep Vladimir.

Dammit, Renee! Jack, with the dammit.

First Dammit

From Mrs. Islamic President!

We Miss You

And your hot 28 year old brother!

Accent Problems

The older Russian brother sounds like he's from Ohio. The younger brother has a slight Brighton Beach edge.

Ack.

Quick, Get President Hassan Some Hair Gel

That's Logical

Good for Ziya to have a little snort of vodka. Alcohol helps with the shock of amputation.

Here's A Good Cover For Bridezilla

Tell 'em you have to go home to change out of that cocktail dress.

(It will be splattered anyways by the time you've dispatched Kevin. Remember: make it look like a home invasion.)

Don't Ask Arlo

Ask Chloe.

Chloe, Can You Cover For Me?

I have to go home and kill my meth-head ex-boyfriend who is blackmailing me.

REALLUY? She's unstable

if that isn't the pot....

A Rough Patch?

When I go through a rough patch, I eat a whole pint of Dulce de Leche in an evening.

Renee's rough patch?

You Say Nuclear, I Say Nucular

All of these different accents...each family has multiple accents.

Let's call the whole thing off.

Previously On 24: What Was I Thinking?

In a TV violence-induced haze of self punishment (I was home alone, so had no other target for my aggression) I actually wrote our "Previously On 24" last week after the show, just to show I can take pain.

Good thing I don't own a vise.

Check last week's post for our full-on recap of last week's splattery action.

Questions to ponder:

• Will Arlo meet Milo in heaven?
• What happened to Wilson (Will Patten, sigh) after Renee "almost" killed him?
• Could "M" and I die and go to heaven, and could we get Stanley Tucci as one of the bad guys later this season? (Back in the day, he and Kevin Spacey played awesome bad guys on Wiseguy. That's a show I should rent on Netflix. At the time I loved it. But I wonder if it could stand up to 24?)
• Will we get to see Olivia in an orange jumpsuit? (Hermes orange, but of course.)
• Whatever's going on between Madame President and Evil Ethan, please may we be spared any PDA?
• How many more episodes will we have to endure with Meth-Head Kevin (thank you Tai) before Bridezilla goes all medieval on him and kills him in a faux home invasion in her far too expensive for her paygrade Manhattan pad?

And stay tuned for a post aggregating some of our predictions...